Log for: Meet the Oscillating Unit

"Clock's ticking."

The grandfather clock. In my bedroom. She saw it. She... I'm going to die. He's going to kill me.

I had myself so convinced I could beat him. I was convinced there was hope. I shouldn't talk like this. That woman, Desiree, she and Peter say that it's not set in stone. But... I'm scared. How can I beat this? If I just... never go back to my apartment? He'll just find me somewhere else. I don't know what to do. I'm scared. I'm so, so scared.

He has Mohinder. He has Molly. It's only a matter of time.

"You had real pretty eyes."

Log for: General Freaking Hospital

I met Peter Petrelli today. He's nice. Very nice. He also took on my ability. Another Psychometer. With all my flaws.

It confirms my hypothesis. If Gabriel Gray takes me... If he takes my power, it will be his undoing. One vision. One good vision is all it will take. He'll be down and the others will have their chance. Even if I die, I'll still win.

I told Peter everything. About what I see and feel. About my thoughts. They aren't my thoughts. They are my thoughts. They are. My own. I could kill him. I could do just like Gray does. I could get inside that head of his and take his abilities. All of them. I could be unstoppable. I could kill Gray. I could be the one who comes out on top. I could be the best. I am the best. Gabriel Gray is nothing but an insignificant little cockroach. They are all nothing more than a Not mine. Just... echoes. Slivers of thought left in my mind. Peter's right. I'm better than that. I've got the determination to make sure that Gray never gets what he wants from me.

I will not:
Scream.
Utter that name.
Become like him.

Parkman.
Where do I begin? He's... He was in my head. Speaking. I knew he could do it. Or I suspected. Knew? I don't know what I know and what my visions have told me anymore. But I know he made me see things. I saw him with his gun out. And then nothing. I saw it. He'll really kill me if I don't keep my distance from Mohinder and Molly. I'm going to have to convince Mohinder to teach me how to do my own injections. I need to stay on top of this. And I need to stay away from him. For both our sakes. I need to stay away from Parkman. If he were anybody else, I'd keep him close. Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer. Except when your enemies can read your mind.
I hope Molly is okay.

I was almost surprised that Nathan came to see me. He wants to spare me any more pain, I know that much. He doesn't want to give me this false hope if he can't... heal me. Whatever that means. Claire. Her blood will fix everything. It can give me back my No. They aren't even mine to regain. What is wrong with He's a sweet man. In his own way. Ways different than his brother. Very different. Peter comforts. But Nathan makes me feel safe. I know Nathan has it in him to do whatever needs to be done to do whatever job he sets out to do. Peter... He might hesitate. Peter is the one who stands by and inspires. He's not a one-man army. He should be! He's squandering his gifts. He's not worthy of

Ed was the surprise of the night. I got my job back, but none of that matters now. I'm pleased he brought me the gin. He may have me pegged, he knows I don't let my guard down, but the morphine is a factor he hasn't had to consider yet. I hope he'll buy it. I have to keep him close to me. Have to keep him believing I want him. That I want him to want me.
Would I shag him? In a heartbeat. To make him believe that I'm stuck on him. Girls aren't nearly as threatening when they're lovesick, are they? No. They're easily manipulated. I'm counting on Edward Boone to be One Of Those. Go on ahead, use me.... partner.

Log for: The Midnight Oil

I'm penning this quickly while I wait for Boone to get to the car, before I forget it.

He knows about Gray. He knows. He doesn't want to believe what he's seen, but he knows. And... I suspect he has an ability. Or... I don't know. I'd need to talk to Nathan before even considering this conclusion.

Bonnie and Clyde, we are. Except Bonnie and Clyde were the bad guys. Are we the bad guys? We might be vigilantes, but we aren't wrong. Killing Gray will be a blessing to people like us. To the world. President Gray... Never.

----

No. No no no. This can't be happening. I trusted him. I trusted that he might have an ability. I still believe he does. But he's also... I don't like the vibe I'm getting. I don't like what I've seen. I don't like what my visions have told me. I don't know who to call first. Suresh? Nakamura? ...Petrelli? Shit.

Can't sleep. I want to sleep. The alcohol is telling me to sleep. It's begging me. But I can't sleep.

He knows where I live.

Log for: A Game of a Different Sort

I met with Agent Edward Boone of the FBI. He wants me back on the Gray case... I have mixed feelings on the matter. There is a big part of me that wants that, very much. I want the chance to bring him down. I want the authority.

I want his blood.

Something doesn't sit right with me about this Boone bloke. He just... He doesn't seem angry enough to me. Gray took his partner from him. She was beautiful, she was. A tragedy. She's the type of woman that makes people like me. Makes people like Edward Boone. Makes people like Judah Demsky. It only takes one.

I don't want to be the next Eden McCain.