Log for: Something is Building...

I finally got around to telling Mohinder about the new visions. About Boone. I frustrate him, it's obvious. I can't seem to... I'll have to behave. I have a feeling he'd make good on his threat.

Eden McCain. The name bothered him. I suspect he was closer to her than he's letting on, but I won't pursue it. I'll keep Boone within arm's reach. Being close is better than keeping away and missing something important.

Something is coming. I know it is. Everything is building up to... I don't know what. I need to relax. Ice cream and gin. That'll do the trick. Is it the storm?

Log for: The Other Kind of Drug Testing

The first vision, when Mohinder used the placebo... God, it hurt. I felt everything Gray felt. It was like I was going through it myself. It wasn't as though I was seeing it through his eyes. I was still outside of it all, like always. But... I wanted to die. My head hurt so bad. And all that anger. I wanted to pull Mohinder's head off his shoulders. And it wasn't my emotion. It was Gray's.

But, it worked. The drug worked. I was able to have a vision without blacking out.

Chandra Suresh. He got everything he deserved for his doubt. He should never have underestimated

I felt everything he felt.

I am hungry.

Log for: This Was Not a Date

It's settled. I'm giving up on Mohinder. He's adorable and he's sweet and all of those things, but... If I hit him any harder with what's obvious to anybody else, one of us is just going to end up hurt.

Parkman may annoy me, but I'm not about to carry on with his flatmate just out of spite. Hopefully this will ease things. Parkman and I are better off as friends than merely co-workers. For various reasons.

I still don't fully trust him.

Log for: The Telephone Game

Oh, shit. He's out.

Log for: Houston, We Have a Problem

Fucking Parkman! I can't believe he's making me stay in here! I can live with him getting the promotion. He's a damn good cop. But I can't believe Holcombe gave him my cases. I can't believe she would partner him with Jude! He's my partner!

It's not that I want to see Judah held back, but I don't want to be left behind...

No. No. No. This is not important. None of this is important. What's important is that I get out of this room before Gabriel Gray shows up. He'll kill to get to me. And I can't place the people in this hospital in danger.

I've seen what Parkman becomes. I've seen the agenda he adopts in the future. I can't trust him.

Serve and protect.

Log for: Loose Cannon

Lieutenant Holcombe didn't fire me. This is good news. I fully expected to be joining the ranks of the unemployed. She's turned me into a desk jockey, however. That's nothing new. She did that to me when I first started having the blackouts. I'll work through this. I've got to.

Log for: Beaten, But Not Broken

"You're beyond your breaking point."

I am not. I refuse to let Gray break me. He spooked me, yes. I was afraid for my life, but to quote... What does not kill me, makes me stronger. Every time Gray tries to fuck with me, I'll just come back stronger.

Until he's just one more dead cockroach.

Log for: A Strong Undercurrent of "Skank"

I was still shaken up from my encounter with Gray even after the meeting Nakamura called. I don't know why I felt I had to talk to Suresh. I had to talk to someone that understands the situation. And I felt comfortable, so it may as well have been with him. I'm glad I did. I told him about how I'm beginning to understand Gray. Not the whole story, but enough to vent it. Enough to feel better.

I'm glad I decided to escort him back to the lab after discovering that Bishop woman inside. She worries me. But if not for her presence, I wouldn't have attempted to have a vision of my own volition. I can't even begin to put into words how happy I am to know that I can do that. I still blacked out, but it was only for a couple of minutes. It was worth it to discover my abilities are growing. Too bad it left me so darn tired...

Log for: A Plan to Save Peter Petrelli

I got Nakamura's message. At first, I wasn't sure I was going to show up for this meeting. But... After dealing with Gray, I had to. I'm in far too deep to think about backing out. I may as well keep going. Try to do some good while I still can. Seeing Nathan Petrelli was positively eerie. It's like meeting a celebrity, but discovering they're in your knitting group. It's surreal. I think I was almost more surprised by the presence of A.D.A. Marx, however. I sort of suspected, giving his willingness to believe that someone could be persuaded to kill themselves over the phone. That man Jack. I feel like I know him from somewhere, but I couldn't place it. ...Oh. Crap.


Sometimes... it seems as though everything is connected.

Log for: Unprofessional

Gray is crazy. I knew that going into this. But there's no accounting for some things...

He wants to make it personal, all right. It's personal. He has no idea how badly I want to kill him. None. It would be doing the world a favour. I need to tell Jude. I need to tell him about me. About Gray. About what I can do. About what he's done.

Give me one good excuse, Gray. One that no jury will ever convict me for.

Log for: Lies and Lists

Mohinder has given me some ideas, and a list of names. I have to interrogate Gray again. This time, without my partner.

Log for: It's Really Not a Tumor

Gray was stalking Suresh. He came up behind me and pressed a gun to my back. I've been in that sort of situation before, but after my last vision... I almost fainted again just hearing his voice. That monster. I told him I didn't have an ability. I told him I'm dying. I'm not sure whether he really bought it, or if he just decided I wasn't worth the effort. If Suresh hadn't been there... I'm glad he was there.

God, it was therapeutic to beat the piss out of Gray. It made it worth it to let Suresh alibi me by nearly breaking my nose.

Log for: Visions of Violence
Log for: Elephants, Guns, and Paintbrushes! Oh My!

I had the chance to meet up with Nakamura. He seems alive and well. If I didn't know better, I would have thought he was never dead. I'm sworn to secrecy, though. I'm not allowed to let on that I know what happened to him. That suits me just fine. Who would believe me?

I paid a visit to Doctor Suresh. He agreed to test my abilities. I wasn't ready for what was thrown at me, as much as I hate to admit it...

I'd seen Gabriel Gray before. In the vision I had from touching Nakamura's sword. I saw him kill his mother. But the vision that hit me when I touched the paintbrush Suresh handed to me.. I have never seen anything so frightening. I... I have to stop him.

Log for: Don't Let Me Down

He's dead.

No, not dead. Yes. He is dead. Was dead? Is.

I was relegated to pulling pussy cats out of trees. Or investigating strange sounds in alleyways. Nothing important. But then I found him. Hiro Nakamura. Dead. With Parkman's little girl and his flatmate. I thought I would die on the spot. I've been promised that Hiro will be all right. He's been the only thing to give me hope that I'm not crazy.

But now I have new hope. And Doctor Suresh's number.